The Weekly Bean

You are NOT going to believe what has happened in our neighborhood!

It's the best-est thing that could EVER happen to two corgis!

The BEST-EST, BEST-EST thing EVER!!!

The nice people up at the model homes have put a WHOLE CONTAINER OF PUPPY DOG TREATS OUT IN FRONT OF THEIR OFFICE!!!!

TREATS!  IN A BIG BOX!!!

FREE!!!!

RIGHT. ON. THE. STREET!!!!!

Treats!  In a Box!!

When we go walking, we have learned to navigate over there no matter where we are in our neighborhood!

Of course, our Mama is sucking ALL of the HAPPY out of this development.

First, she will only let us go up there once a day.

Once we discovered the treats, we had a meeting and decided that we would tell her that we want to walk at least 20 times a day in order to keep ourselves at a 'healthy weight'. (We still don't know what a 'healthy weight' is and we still don't care but we figure if that's something Mama wants us to have and lying about our motives will help us keep from starving to death, we may as well play her.)

But she won't let us walk 20 times a day.  She said 3 times a day is plenty and we still only get one trip to the treat box.

Not to be thwarted, we switched tactics and told her that we need to go walking and 'potty' 20 times a day - but she said we can go in the back yard.

*heavy sigh*

Do you see what we have to deal with?

Then, since we only get to go once, we decided that we would ask to eat 20 treats per visit.  But Mama said no and she will only give us one treat each.

Can you believe that?

Mama says that we have to be 'polite' and save some of the treats for all the other losers puppies who live in our neighborhood.  We have explained to her over and over that that is not how it works.  The 'dog rules' are clear:  if we are there and the other dogs are not there, then we get to eat ALL of the treats.

But no matter how many times we explain to her, she still will not let us have more than one each. And when we insisted she threatened not to let us have any treats at all!

*heavy sigh*

Our Mama is so difficult.

And then - before she will even give us our one *piddly* little treat (Milk Bones, by the way) she makes us sit all the way down on our butts before she will let us have them.

All. The. Way. Down. On. Our. Butts. 

We have explained to her that we object to obeying in principal and that we find sitting down and waiting politely tedious and that the treats will be in our mouths much faster if we both stand up against her legs while we eat our treats.  But she says we have scratchy toes - so she makes us sit down.

What's a scratchy toe when you're starving to death?

Sitting and Unhappy

The bright spot is that any time we can get The Boy to walk us, he will always take us up there and he will at least give us two treats each sometimes and he doesn't even make us sit on our butts first.

He's a sucker our friend, you know.

We've been mildly successful in getting him around to our way of thinking.   He also slips us wheat thins and bananas when Mama isn't looking - but don't tell her that or she will 'speak to him' about it.

We hate it when Mama has to 'speak' to someone.  It usually either means that we are in trouble or that she's going to cut off one of our perfectly good scams.

We hope other corgis' Mamas are not as difficult as ours' is....