I went to a cottage this weekend with a bunch of couples. I was the only single one. I've definitely felt alone in a room full of people. Everyone had this secret language, secret partnership and I had lil' ol' me. I often become overwhelmed by feeling alone. And then all I find I want to be when I'm feeling that way is...alone. You want everyone to disappear if it's just going to make you feel lonelier than you already are. It doesn't make sense. But there you have it.
I know. My problem is that I want to be single and all the other girls I know are either married or want to be married - which is great - but I don't want to be married and I'm happy. Which makes me a bit suspect. They either think I'm bitter or I'm deluding myself - and I'm neither. And it frustrates me. And I wish I knew another person who was ambivalent about what it means to be somebody's wife.
I am right there with you...single and happy. While there was a time that I didn't choose to be that way, I do now. If I had a dollar for every time a married person told me how smart I was for being single, I would be a VERY rich woman!
This is refreshing for me. I really want to get to a point where I don't want marriage. I certainly don't want to be married to just anybody. I find it hard that there are so few single gals around to do single gal things with - everyone needs to consult someone before making plans. I miss my teens and early 20s for that.
I have absolutely felt lonely in a room full of people, even in a room filled with people who are supposedly my friends. Sometimes I feel like I have nothing to offer other people- it's a terrible feeling. Just read some of your other readers' comments and I think there is a bit of discrimination at every age and stage: singles vs. marrieds, marrieds vs. marrieds with kids and so on and so on. When we are not on the same page as others, sometimes they see it as a rejection of the path they have chosen...which can make them feel uncomfortable.